My recent experience with the guy who screamed like a girl when he reached the valley of the big O made me think about why he it was he so quickly became not as attractive or appealing to me.
The hard worn path to manliness is a difficult one to tread, and not one which many men do exceedingly well. And in my experience, neither do english men.
I have never met a more effimate bunch of straight men in my life which is what makes dealing and consequently dating them so frustrating and intriguing in the last three years I've been over here and as far as I can tell, its all down to political correctness.
I dont like to typecast a group of men, but english men by definition really are another beast all together. They are completely and utterly clumsy when it comes to flirting in fact, they often just avoid that all together and let drunkeness do the job. Then when they are well bladdered, they attempt to kiss or grab the object of their interest in a dark corner somewhere. I wouldn't say australian men are especially skilled at this and can often also be like bulls in a china shop, but at least they do make it abundantly clear when they are interested.
This week I ended up unintentionally pissing off three men who apparently were interested because I just had no clue whatsoever, apparently a guy at work had his eye on me and got very very upset when he heard of my conquest last week at the work xmas party and now will not talk to me.
The second I met while out and was flirting with him and then was chatting to a friend of mine which he mistook as another love interest and left in a huff. The third is a former BF who has been texting and went MIA for a few days only to come back and accuse me of seeing someone because that could be the only reason I hadn't been in touch with him.
Seriously? I am single. I am not bethrothed or spoken for, nor am I tied to anyone in particular. That is what being single is all about. So frankly, boys get it together. Man up as the english phrase goes. Grab your balls, check they still exist and bloody make some noise and pusue.
If you want it bad enough to need to put your ego to the side and risk some embarassment by at least taking a risk. Forget being politically correct, if you like my rack just say so.
xx
jh
meanwhile thought I'd share the below aus blog. It says manliness isn't something u take for granted these days, you need to seize it and I completely agree! http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/manliness-isnt-just-granted-youve-got-to-claim-it/
Showing posts with label flirting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label flirting. Show all posts
Friday, 10 December 2010
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Senoritas put your hands up
The sacred art of flirting in the UK is not faring so well. Correction, it's doing dismally according to a new report which has come out from the social networking site, Badoo. It has ranked the top countries of the world on their flirtability and the fire in the pants of their men and women. However it appears the British folk must have been having a cold shower at the time of the survey or sticking to their 'no sex please, we're British' mantra.
Worse still, Australians aren't even listed. The shame! Mainly at being beaten by the British on any scoreboard. Mind you most Australian men don't excell in the art of flirting. A sad fact. but it's true. They are as obvious as a brick wall and consider staring at your breasts for long periods of time as a successful form of flirting. How can I argue with this logic, afterall it's worked on me before..
In the meantime this flirtatious study, has ranked Spain as the number one flirtalicious country due to its fiesty femme fatales and equally molten muscular men who can make most women melt with their chocolate brown eyes.
It's funny though, in the times I have been to visit Spain I have found the men to be very clear in their flirty, there is no mistaking it, but you soon have to leave the bar due to their persistent efforts and often feel like taking a bath due to the lecherous behaviour of many a frisky spaniard.
Not to type cast an entire country of course, but I've hardly been charmed by the ardour of the flirting styles of many country, for instance;
1) Italians - for all the coo coo coo of their italiano language, I really didn't enjoy their penchant for bottom pinching which left my own derriere covered in bruises
2) Egyptians - lets face it being asked if they can buy you for 10 camels gets old after a while, especially when the girl next to you has been offered 25
3) British - the lets pretend to ignore girls and talk in code like silly teenagers hardly makes any woman's heart beat faster. Nor is the fascination with bottoms alluring. They aren't funny, and nor is constantly telling jokes about them
4) Americans - telling me my legs are like stems to a beautiful flower will not gain you access to it. In fact I'll just laugh in your face. They are great at the lines, not so strong on delivery
5) Irish - Their accents will make even a random reading from a shopping list sound sexy but when they get themselves so drunk, so often that they are unable to 'perfrom' it gets to a point when you literally just take matters into your own hands
6) Scottish - We'd all like to find our own william wallace and have him pick a war with England but they are pretty much on par with australians when it comes to sophisticated flirting. Best example which springs to mine is one fine kilted fellow asking me "Would you like to see my nessie?'.. charming
7)French - We we we, merci are not words that I consider to be part of my erogenous zone so whispering them over and over again just gets annoying.. Being told I am ' a werrry bootifuul wemen' is about as complicated as it gets. Slightly even less endearing when you hear him try it out on the other 6 women in the cafe sitting near you..
8) Spanish - hola chica whoppa.. doesn't actually feel all that flattering to me, the first thing it makes me think of is a whopper with cheese at burger king. But I will give them this, spaniards know how to dance and their eyebrows are famously flirtatious. However, the majority of the time I just feel like they move around too much, its oddly distracting like two hairy catapillars doing a tango to the death on their forehead.
9) Brazilian - I can't fault this group at all. The women are women and are sensual right down to their tippy toes. They'd look sexy in a dishrag. The men look good with long or short hair and while strangely a bit effiminate, they are very seductive in their style. I've heard this described as the three charm offensive. 1) touch her on the elbow to show proximity, 2) touch her on the waist and lean in close 3) lean in close and whisper in her ear and then lead her to the dance floor and she'll be yours. It works, and it works well.
10) Aussies - I couldn't leave them out of the list. It's my home and where I've heard the most charming pick up line of them all ' If I was a squirrel, would you let me store my nuts in your hole?'.. a sure fire way to melt a girls heart isn't it?
xx
jh.. ps list of most flirtatious nations according to survey is below
Worse still, Australians aren't even listed. The shame! Mainly at being beaten by the British on any scoreboard. Mind you most Australian men don't excell in the art of flirting. A sad fact. but it's true. They are as obvious as a brick wall and consider staring at your breasts for long periods of time as a successful form of flirting. How can I argue with this logic, afterall it's worked on me before..
In the meantime this flirtatious study, has ranked Spain as the number one flirtalicious country due to its fiesty femme fatales and equally molten muscular men who can make most women melt with their chocolate brown eyes.
It's funny though, in the times I have been to visit Spain I have found the men to be very clear in their flirty, there is no mistaking it, but you soon have to leave the bar due to their persistent efforts and often feel like taking a bath due to the lecherous behaviour of many a frisky spaniard.
Not to type cast an entire country of course, but I've hardly been charmed by the ardour of the flirting styles of many country, for instance;
1) Italians - for all the coo coo coo of their italiano language, I really didn't enjoy their penchant for bottom pinching which left my own derriere covered in bruises
2) Egyptians - lets face it being asked if they can buy you for 10 camels gets old after a while, especially when the girl next to you has been offered 25
3) British - the lets pretend to ignore girls and talk in code like silly teenagers hardly makes any woman's heart beat faster. Nor is the fascination with bottoms alluring. They aren't funny, and nor is constantly telling jokes about them
4) Americans - telling me my legs are like stems to a beautiful flower will not gain you access to it. In fact I'll just laugh in your face. They are great at the lines, not so strong on delivery
5) Irish - Their accents will make even a random reading from a shopping list sound sexy but when they get themselves so drunk, so often that they are unable to 'perfrom' it gets to a point when you literally just take matters into your own hands
6) Scottish - We'd all like to find our own william wallace and have him pick a war with England but they are pretty much on par with australians when it comes to sophisticated flirting. Best example which springs to mine is one fine kilted fellow asking me "Would you like to see my nessie?'.. charming
7)French - We we we, merci are not words that I consider to be part of my erogenous zone so whispering them over and over again just gets annoying.. Being told I am ' a werrry bootifuul wemen' is about as complicated as it gets. Slightly even less endearing when you hear him try it out on the other 6 women in the cafe sitting near you..
8) Spanish - hola chica whoppa.. doesn't actually feel all that flattering to me, the first thing it makes me think of is a whopper with cheese at burger king. But I will give them this, spaniards know how to dance and their eyebrows are famously flirtatious. However, the majority of the time I just feel like they move around too much, its oddly distracting like two hairy catapillars doing a tango to the death on their forehead.
9) Brazilian - I can't fault this group at all. The women are women and are sensual right down to their tippy toes. They'd look sexy in a dishrag. The men look good with long or short hair and while strangely a bit effiminate, they are very seductive in their style. I've heard this described as the three charm offensive. 1) touch her on the elbow to show proximity, 2) touch her on the waist and lean in close 3) lean in close and whisper in her ear and then lead her to the dance floor and she'll be yours. It works, and it works well.
10) Aussies - I couldn't leave them out of the list. It's my home and where I've heard the most charming pick up line of them all ' If I was a squirrel, would you let me store my nuts in your hole?'.. a sure fire way to melt a girls heart isn't it?
xx
jh.. ps list of most flirtatious nations according to survey is below
WORLD FLIRTATION LEAGUE
RANK COUNTRY SCORE*
1. Spain 1.33
2. Poland 1.31
3. Dominican Republic 1.25
4.= Italy 1.13
4.= Argentina 1.13
6. Brazil 1.12
7. Chile 1.09
8. Portugal 1.04
9. Canada 0.96
10. Venezuela 0.94
11. Netherlands 0.86
12. Germany 0.81
13. Colombia 0.80
14. UK 0.78
15. Czech Republic 0.76
16. Mexico 0.72
17. France 0.69
18. Belgium 0.68
19. United States 0.63
20. Ecuador 0.62
RANK COUNTRY SCORE*
1. Spain 1.33
2. Poland 1.31
3. Dominican Republic 1.25
4.= Italy 1.13
4.= Argentina 1.13
6. Brazil 1.12
7. Chile 1.09
8. Portugal 1.04
9. Canada 0.96
10. Venezuela 0.94
11. Netherlands 0.86
12. Germany 0.81
13. Colombia 0.80
14. UK 0.78
15. Czech Republic 0.76
16. Mexico 0.72
17. France 0.69
18. Belgium 0.68
19. United States 0.63
20. Ecuador 0.62
Monday, 11 October 2010
Two wheeled flirting London style
Blue skies seem to have brought out the smiles today and the inner flirt in leveryone. I cycled into work today and nearly fell off my bike. Not due to a rogue jaywalker or sneaky car door. But due to some surreptious flirting from my fellow riders on the road.
I was dressed in nothing flash, just a touch of lycra, a hoodie and pink helmet and gloves but it was more my bike than me that seemed to attract attention at least to start with. I was casually stopped at lights when I felt eyes on me, I turned and saw mister serious cyclist eyeing my bike up and down, like he would like nothing better than to be alone with it in a dark room. I felt like draping my bike in a towel just to protect her modesty. When I caught him looking at my bike and admiring my wicker basket he nodded and said 'Nice bike', much the way I've heard many men say 'Nice tits'.
At 7am in the morning it was the last thing I expected to experience at Euston station crossing intersection. He gave me a wink and another nod and rode off. I was still a bit bemused and to be honest still waking up when I got to the third set of lights and another cyclist went past me, only instead of whizzing past he slowed down turned to me and said 'morninnng'.. not as in a typical brisk 'Morning' but with a slow drawl that is said with a smile and hidden wink in the words. I nearly tumbled off my bike and started to think what is going on today?
I was still thinking about the first two earlier incidents when I heard a bike bell chirping, shrilling from the opposite side of the road. I looked over and saw another male cyclist, decked out in full lycra and waterbottle in hand, looking my way. Correction. Looking at me. I twinged my bell twice and he nodded. I nodded. He winked, I smiled. He gave a tilt of the head and I raised my eyebrows. The lights turned green and we went in opposite directions, cheeky grins fixed on both our faces.
I don't know if it was the blue sky, the way the sun glinted on my pale blue pashley or something in the air, but I think I might be wearing the same pullover again tomorrow. Who knows, perhaps Mr Darcy might ride past ;P
xx
jh
I was dressed in nothing flash, just a touch of lycra, a hoodie and pink helmet and gloves but it was more my bike than me that seemed to attract attention at least to start with. I was casually stopped at lights when I felt eyes on me, I turned and saw mister serious cyclist eyeing my bike up and down, like he would like nothing better than to be alone with it in a dark room. I felt like draping my bike in a towel just to protect her modesty. When I caught him looking at my bike and admiring my wicker basket he nodded and said 'Nice bike', much the way I've heard many men say 'Nice tits'.
At 7am in the morning it was the last thing I expected to experience at Euston station crossing intersection. He gave me a wink and another nod and rode off. I was still a bit bemused and to be honest still waking up when I got to the third set of lights and another cyclist went past me, only instead of whizzing past he slowed down turned to me and said 'morninnng'.. not as in a typical brisk 'Morning' but with a slow drawl that is said with a smile and hidden wink in the words. I nearly tumbled off my bike and started to think what is going on today?
I was still thinking about the first two earlier incidents when I heard a bike bell chirping, shrilling from the opposite side of the road. I looked over and saw another male cyclist, decked out in full lycra and waterbottle in hand, looking my way. Correction. Looking at me. I twinged my bell twice and he nodded. I nodded. He winked, I smiled. He gave a tilt of the head and I raised my eyebrows. The lights turned green and we went in opposite directions, cheeky grins fixed on both our faces.
I don't know if it was the blue sky, the way the sun glinted on my pale blue pashley or something in the air, but I think I might be wearing the same pullover again tomorrow. Who knows, perhaps Mr Darcy might ride past ;P
xx
jh
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)